A warm welcome back to Youkay!
1st June, BMI flight 58 LHR – EDI
BMI stands for bl***y-near missed it today! As I politely informed the ever so slightly stroppy lady at the departure gate, this was not through any fault of my own.
On the advice of the transfer desk, I went to the BMI Lounge where the flight would be announced and the gate closer than the alternative option of the Star Alliance Lounge.
I passed a pleasant few hours of safety margin between arrival from the US and departure to my final destination of the day in Edinburgh. Wireless internet wasn’t working because of a change of service provider (yeah, right!). The resident laptop refused to access most of the sites I wanted (blocked pop up windows I suspect), and was completely disconnected from the printer .
But no big deal, a copy of the Guardian and a passable cup of tea were acceptable alternatives.
The first boarding call came. I packed up and set off at a fast trot, as gate 78 didn’t sound too close to the lounge beside gate 2. It wasn’t – and I barely managed not to bowl slow moving old ladies over in the maze of long narrow corridors that reminded the kiwi gal in me of sheep dipping pens.
I got to the gate just after my name had been removed from the passenger list and my flight-weary bag ordered off the plane. All the way from Auckland – LA – Austin – LA – London Heathrow without a hitch just to be nearly tripped at the last hurdle!
But after some serious negotiation, all ended well. The lady did tell me pointedly that everyone else from the lounge had managed to get there in time. This is Youkay – to borrow that moniker from Jonathon Raban – where the customer is always wrong! The baggage handler drove the point home, but graciously enough, after putting my bag back on the plane. I decided to fall somewhere just offside of that sword and only commented on the poor timing of the boarding announcement.
Finally on board a more than half empty plane, I had time to appreciate that Star Alliance Gold membership is acknowledged by a seat right behind others that are exactly the same but have a gold dandruff-catcher / napkin rather than a blue one. Reminds me of traveling first class on a train, where a snowy white napkin emblazoned with a large number 1 was the only discernible difference from cattle class.
On flight 58, just to rub the noses of the 'almost rans', in the fact that status matters in this fair country, after take off, the empty rows for the privileged few were shielded from the gaze of the plebs in the back by the closure of a set of very tatty blue curtains.
I hardly dared break into that sanctuary of the better off to get to the loo at the front of the cabin, though when I did, was relieved (!) to find they haven’t yet installed the coin slots that soon may have to be fed to get through the door. To be fair, it is another airline announced plans to introduce this, but the fast food style catering on offer at no small cost on this flight suggests the idea could well catch on.
I would not have been at all a happy bunny if I’d been charged for the disgusting state of this airborne loo. Without going into too much detail, the floor was wet and sticky and the seat wet and shiny with no seat covers available. YUK!
I decided not to fork out the astronomical price of a cuppa or accept a meal deal that smacked of that world famous Scottish sounding chain feed trough, and thought WELCOME BACK TO YOUKAY! I SEE THE SERVICE HASN'T IMPROVED!
Tomorrow promises another interesting experience as we travel the cheapest airline of them all to Malta - the one that did announce a plan to introduce charges for using the toilet (maybe a cheap advertizing campaign?) and is openly proud of offering not a single frill with the service. I guess we’ll take packed lunches and hope they haven’t thought of a byo food surcharge! Maybe I could sell them the idea!
BMI stands for bl***y-near missed it today! As I politely informed the ever so slightly stroppy lady at the departure gate, this was not through any fault of my own.
On the advice of the transfer desk, I went to the BMI Lounge where the flight would be announced and the gate closer than the alternative option of the Star Alliance Lounge.
I passed a pleasant few hours of safety margin between arrival from the US and departure to my final destination of the day in Edinburgh. Wireless internet wasn’t working because of a change of service provider (yeah, right!). The resident laptop refused to access most of the sites I wanted (blocked pop up windows I suspect), and was completely disconnected from the printer .
But no big deal, a copy of the Guardian and a passable cup of tea were acceptable alternatives.
The first boarding call came. I packed up and set off at a fast trot, as gate 78 didn’t sound too close to the lounge beside gate 2. It wasn’t – and I barely managed not to bowl slow moving old ladies over in the maze of long narrow corridors that reminded the kiwi gal in me of sheep dipping pens.
I got to the gate just after my name had been removed from the passenger list and my flight-weary bag ordered off the plane. All the way from Auckland – LA – Austin – LA – London Heathrow without a hitch just to be nearly tripped at the last hurdle!
But after some serious negotiation, all ended well. The lady did tell me pointedly that everyone else from the lounge had managed to get there in time. This is Youkay – to borrow that moniker from Jonathon Raban – where the customer is always wrong! The baggage handler drove the point home, but graciously enough, after putting my bag back on the plane. I decided to fall somewhere just offside of that sword and only commented on the poor timing of the boarding announcement.
Finally on board a more than half empty plane, I had time to appreciate that Star Alliance Gold membership is acknowledged by a seat right behind others that are exactly the same but have a gold dandruff-catcher / napkin rather than a blue one. Reminds me of traveling first class on a train, where a snowy white napkin emblazoned with a large number 1 was the only discernible difference from cattle class.
On flight 58, just to rub the noses of the 'almost rans', in the fact that status matters in this fair country, after take off, the empty rows for the privileged few were shielded from the gaze of the plebs in the back by the closure of a set of very tatty blue curtains.
I hardly dared break into that sanctuary of the better off to get to the loo at the front of the cabin, though when I did, was relieved (!) to find they haven’t yet installed the coin slots that soon may have to be fed to get through the door. To be fair, it is another airline announced plans to introduce this, but the fast food style catering on offer at no small cost on this flight suggests the idea could well catch on.I would not have been at all a happy bunny if I’d been charged for the disgusting state of this airborne loo. Without going into too much detail, the floor was wet and sticky and the seat wet and shiny with no seat covers available. YUK!
I decided not to fork out the astronomical price of a cuppa or accept a meal deal that smacked of that world famous Scottish sounding chain feed trough, and thought WELCOME BACK TO YOUKAY! I SEE THE SERVICE HASN'T IMPROVED!
Tomorrow promises another interesting experience as we travel the cheapest airline of them all to Malta - the one that did announce a plan to introduce charges for using the toilet (maybe a cheap advertizing campaign?) and is openly proud of offering not a single frill with the service. I guess we’ll take packed lunches and hope they haven’t thought of a byo food surcharge! Maybe I could sell them the idea!
posted by Cathy Gunn at
June 08, 2009
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